Cover image for Voice lessons for parents : what to say, how to say it, and when to listen / Wendy Mogel, PhD.
Voice lessons for parents : what to say, how to say it, and when to listen / Wendy Mogel, PhD.
First Scribner hardcover edition.
Publication Information:
New York : Scribner, 2018.
Physical Description:
xvi, 302 pages ; 24 cm
The audience is listening : from infancy through toddlerhood -- The cathedral space of childhood : learning the language of your child's world -- The biggest, strongest, fastest : connecting with young boys -- The boss, the bestie, the high priestess of pretend : conversing with young girls -- Hard topics : talking to young children about sex, death, and money -- Spirit guides in disguise : an introduction to teenagers -- The exchange student Kazakhstan : teenage boys -- The visiting niece from a distant state : teenage girls -- The opinionators : teaming up with your partner, your ex, the grandparents, and "Olivia's mom" -- The trustees : getting the best out of nannies, teachers, coaches, and other adults in your child's life -- Appendix: Relative differences between boys and girls in brain development and function, expanded.
Presents an essential guide to the art of talking with children that demonstrates how a change of voice can transform conversations and ease parent-child relationships, sharing strategies for communicating with kids at different age levels.


Call Number
Material Type
Home Location
649.1 MOG Book Adult General Collection

On Order



Renowned speaker, parenting expert, and New York Times bestselling author Dr. Wendy Mogel offers an essential guide to the new art of talking to children, showing how a change in tone and demeanor can transform the relationship between parent and child.

Most parents are perfectly fine communicators--unless they're talking to their children. Then, too often, their pitch rises and they come across as pleading, indignant, wounded, outraged. In tone and body language they signal, I can't handle it when you act like a child.

Dr. Wendy Mogel saw this pattern time and again in her clinical practice. In response, she developed a remarkably effective series of "voice lessons," which she shared with parents who were struggling with their kids. The results were immediate: a shift in vocal style led to children who were calmer, listened more attentively, and communicated with more warmth, respect, and sincerity.

In Voice Lessons for Parents , Mogel elaborates on her novel clinical approach, revealing how each age and stage of a child's life brings new opportunities to connect through language. Drawing from sources as diverse as neuroscience, fairy tales, and anthropology, Mogel offers specific guidance for talking to children across the expanse of childhood and adolescence. She also explains the best ways to talk about your child to partners, exes, and grandparents, as well as to teachers, coaches, and caretakers. Throughout the book, Mogel addresses an obstacle that bedevils even the most seasoned and confident parent: the distraction of digital devices, how they impact our connection with our families, and what we can do about it.

Mogel's now classic book, The Blessing of a Skinned Knee , is a beloved resource for a generation of parents. Voice Lessons for Parents brings her unique brand of practical wisdom to harried parents eager to deepen their relationships with their kids. "Children will lead you on an incredible journey," writes Mogel, "if they trust you, if you take the time, and if you're willing to follow."

Table of Contents

Author's Notep. xiii
Introductionp. 1
1 The Audience Is Listening: From Infancy through Toddlerhoodp. 7
2 The Great Cathedral Space of Childhood: Learning the Language of Your Child's Worldp. 27
3 The Biggest, Strongest, Fastest: Connecting with Young Boysp. 55
4 The Boss, the Bestie, the High Priestess of Pretend: Conversing with Young Girlsp. 87
5 Hard Topics: Talking to Young Children about Sex, Death, and Moneyp. 123
6 Spirit Guides in Disguise: An Introduction to Teenagersp. 157
7 The Exchange Student from Kazakhstan: Teenage Boysp. 183
8 The Visiting Niece from a Distant State: Teenage Girlsp. 199
9 The Opinionators: Teaming Up with Your Partner, Your Ex, the Grandparents, and "Olivia's Mom"p. 215
10 The Trustees: Getting the Best Out of Nannies, Teachers, Coaches, and Other Adults in Your Child's Lifep. 243
Epiloguep. 271
Acknowledgmentsp. 273
Recommended Readingp. 275
Appendix: Relative Differences between Boys and Girls in Brain Development and Function, Expandedp. 279
Notesp. 283
Indexp. 289